1.07.2004

i feel so empty...things are just not working out.i have grown so quiet this year,even worse than the last.i dun feel like talking to people,and i'm too focused on my cca than on schoolwork.i need to get my focus back on my accademic stuff,but it's difficult.i just feel very tired each day.as if one day,i could just fade away from these time when all the energy is slowly being drained out of me.my close friend has grown apart from me.she stays away from me.wheneva she replies most of the time,she seems to be snapping at me.almost like she hates me.some are ignoring me.i have tried everything i could to help salvage,but i still failed.i failed.i seem to fail everything and everybody around me.i can't do anything.i feel so helpless.i also tend to get lost in my thoughts then focus on lessons.Although i smile everyday,everyone thinks i have the perfect life,the person who is being envied by some, the truth is...i'm not.i'm tired of putting up this cover.it's draining my energy day by day.maybe i will drift off this world...

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